Did you know that [counter] people have been having a skeg at my little autonomous region?


On the Eighth Day of Christmas


Today may have been the eighth day of Christmas but it has also been the first day of the year 2014 and the first day of the year in which I will be off to sunny Africa for my biggest and best trip so far. So although I still have 253 sleeps to go until I land in Accra, my life is already filled with tropical sunshine and colourful music to a degree sufficient for me to cope with the bloody awful, miserable English weather we’ve had to endure here today. When I looked out of the window first thing this morning I was so depressed that I decided to throw myself into the river, but the river was so swollen with floodwater that I couldn’t find where the edge of it was to stand on to jump.

Then, after listening to a mere seven minutes and thirteen seconds of the music of Gnonnas Pedro & His Dadjes Band I felt like I was already in Benin. I wonder if Gnonnas Pedro & His Dadjes Band are as excited about me going there as I am. I wonder if they have all thought about getting a pair of Red River Hogs and a chameleon in their front room to make it feel like they are in West Africa like I have done. Actually, I’m lying about the Red River Hogs but I do have hundreds of chameleons scurrying about the place and making themselves look like DFS sofas or artificial Christmas trees so that they aren’t spotted by predators.



Nothing else happened here today but if you could take a photograph of what was going on in my head it would look like this:


Begin the Benin.

Begin the Benin.

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