Did you know that [counter] people have been having a skeg at my little autonomous region?


Excrement & Excitement


In the last month or so I have had drugs pumped into me to protect my mortal cells from just about every disease in the world so I had expected, by now, to be feeling as fit as an ađàn gáo (a Vietnamese violin, just in case you didn’t know). However, last week I was struck down by dose of the snots and aching limbs and a headache and a general feeling of malaise to the extent that I got very little done in terms of preparing for a bike ride from Bangkok to Saigon and lots done in terms of lying on the settee with the gas fire on full blast, replacing body fluids as they gushed out of multiple orifices and pores and listening to a CD. Yes, just the one CD as I hadn’t the energy to change it once it was on so I now know every word of every song on my Rough Guide to the Music of Vietnam disc. Bring on those karaoke bars, I say!

The weekend weather was warm and sunny and springy and just perfect for going out on my bike to do a bit of essential pre-trip training but I didn’t because I felt like a bag of excrement, and runny excrement at that. The pile of paperwork that I always seem to have to wade through during the week before a trip was also ignored on the grounds of ill health (physical and mental), as was my writing to my devoted reader(s) on this blog. On the plus side I am pleased to report that I have spent quite a bit of time in the last week writing for my other literary outlet which may, one day, earn me a few quid. Once the news embargo date has passed I will post it on here for you to read . . . if you still love me, that is!

This uncharacteristic neglect of my blog, my business and my fitness regime has been downright depressing. Had there been a pier in Chippenham I would have gone there and jumped off the end of it. The fact that I will have had no physical exercise in the twelve days prior to a 500 mile bicycle journey terrifies rather than depresses me but what can I do about it other than sit here with a soggy Kleenex up each nostril and be terrified?



One of my many Kleenex moments.


Despite feeling grotty I did manage to gather together all my travelling bits, lay them out neatly on the spare bed and tick them off against my kit list in readiness for shoving in my lovely big travel bag a couple of hours  before I set off. This always makes me feel good, just knowing that departure is imminent.

So now, departure really is imminent and although I’ve still got an absolute mass of stuff to do (including 280 toenails to cut) before I go, there is light at the end of the tunnel so I can see those Củ Chi tunnels at the end of the tunnel and I am as excited as a badger’s excited bits. I wonder if badgers moved into the Củ Chi tunnels when the Viet Cong moved out.

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